HUMOROctober 2010SMS Jokes 2010

SMS Jokes 128

🙁 Huhuhu! Lagi na lang bang ganito? Nakatago? Wala na ba akng karapatang masilayan? Kahit maituwid man lang? ~ Pubic hair

oOo

Man1: “Pare, inom tayo.”
Man2: “Bakit ba yang pareng ‘toy mula ng iniwan ng asawa ay ayaw ng uminon?”
Man1: “Syempre, dahil wala na siyang dahilan para uminom pa!”

oOo

Sa isang jeep:
Bata: “Bayad po.”
Driver: “San galing?”
Bata: “Sa nanay ko.”
Driver: (nainis)
Bata: “Ma, pakibaba nga ako jan sa may kanto..”
Driver: “Bakit? lumpo k ba?”

oOo

If your wife is getting fat, let her walk 3kms in the morning and 3kms in the afternoon.
By the end of the month she will be 180kms away from you. Odiba?

oOo

Confucius says. .
Erection is like the theory of relativity. The more you think about it, the harder it gets.

oOo

A lady walked into a boutique and asked the sales lady, “May I try on that cute dress in the window?”
The sales lady replied, “Sure, but wouldn’t you be more comfortable in a dressing room?”

oOo

Did you hear about the baby born in the delivery room of a high-tech hospital?!

She was CORDLESS!

oOo

Pari: “Di pa ako nakakatikim ng VIRGIN.”
Sakristan: “Kailangan mag alaga kayo ng batang babae. ”
Pari: “Oo nga.” (pagdating ng 13 yrs old batang babae na alagang pari)
Pari:” Iha di ba birthday mo ngayon? Mamayang gabi dito ka matulog sa kuarto ko.”
Iha: “Opo father.”

(kinagabihan)

Iha: “Father, bkit nyo nilalagyan ng lotion ang pekpek ko? ”
Pari: “Para madulas at hindi ka masaktan.”
Iha: “Bakit yung sakristan mo ang nilalagay laway lang? ”

oOo

Sina Manny & Jinkee namamasyal, hinold-up!
Binigay ni manny ang wallet niya, nagalit si jinkee….

Jinkee: “Bakit di mo man lang sinuntok?”
Manny: “Jinkee, ang laman ng wallet ko ay 10k lang….alam mo naman na hindi ako lumalaban kapag hindi milyon no !!!”

oOo

MOTTO NG MAGSYOTA:
“Don’t do to others..
.. what we did last night!”

oOo

Joe’s wife is angry with him because he forgot her birthday. Joe buys her a greeting card, of course, with an apology gift. On the card he writes,

“MySweetest heart, how do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?”

oOo

(4 tatay naghihintay sa labas ng delivery room)
Tatay1: K ambal daw anak ko.Sa Twin Popsicle ako ngwowork
Tatay2: Triplet nman daw anak ko.Sa 3M Corp.ako work
Tatay3: Quadruplet anak nmin.Sa 4 Seasons Hotel ako work
Tatay4: Hinimatay ng madinig kwento ng 3
Nang matauhan umiyak sabay sabi,”di ako dapat nagtrabaho sa 7-11″

oOo

Life is a hOle.
Bakit?. . . Kasi
~ nakakahinga tayo dahil sa BuTaS,
~ nakakain tayo dahil sa Butas,
~ nabubuhay tayo dahil sa Butas
at
~ kapag namatay taYo diretSo sa BUTAS!

oOo

THIGHLAND
has places named
BANGCOCK,
PHUKET,
PATHONG &
PATTIHAYA!
No wonder
they are #1 in HIV cases.
If we follow them,
we’ll be called:
The Philippenis! ?
Ok?

oOo

Before baptism:
Priest: “Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?”
Erap: “Yes Father. I have prepared appetizers & we have a caterer coming with plenty of food for all of our friends.”
Priest: “I don’t mean that. I mean, are you prepared spiritually?”
Erap: “Oh, sure! I’ve got beer & whiskey.”

oOo

BOY: “Pabili nga ng alaxan FR.”
GIRL: “Ilan?”
BOY: “Isa lang, ay ano po ba ibig sabihin ng FR”
GIRL: “ahhm, kwan FEN RELEVER!”

oOo

** Thank you so much MIKE dear, for the above SMS Jokes.

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A single mom to Kevin and Keziah. Sang's bestfriend. Young, Fresh and Delicious. Lol! Blogging since 2005.

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